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5 Ways to Help Your Children Deal with a Divorce

Posted: January 26, 2018

 

A divorce is a traumatic time for the whole family, and children can be particularly affected by it. They may not understand what is going on, or they may feel like it is their fault. It's important to get your children the help they need to cope with the difficult transition that is occurring. These five tips will help your children carry on and adjust to their new normal.

Be Positive

This may be challenging, but it's important to remember that your children are a part of both you and your ex. It's not fair to put them in the middle of the two people that they love most in the world. Encouraging them to maintain a positive relationship with their other parent will go a long way in helping them feel less stressed.

Give Them Healthy Outlets

Maintain a routine for them that includes a positive outlet for negative feelings through exercise and structure. Going through a divorce can make children feel out of control of their life, and getting them involved can give them an area where they are in control of what is going on. This could mean a sport that they enjoy, a club at school, or even taking the dog on a daily walk. Keeping them active and engaged with their peers and other adults will give them plenty of opportunities to talk about their feelings if they need to.

Help Them Feel Comfortable

A divorce typically means going from one home to two. This can be confusing for children who are used to having their space already established. Create a fun environment for them by allowing them to pick out the style of their room or have other input in designing the house. It may also help for younger children to have a special stuffed animal or blanket that they can bring with them to both homes for security.

Don’t Drag It Out

Try to settle disputes as quickly as possible and avoid dragging out the divorce. The sooner your children are established in their new routine, the quicker they will adjust. The best way to make sure that you don’t drag this out longer than you need to is to make sure you have good legal counsel. Your lawyer can help you work through sticky situations much quicker than you can on your own.

Make Sure They Know You Care

It may seem obvious, but children really need to hear that you love them, as often as possible. During trying times, this is even more important. Make it a point to tell them how much you love them on a daily basis, and that although things have changed, your love for them never will.

Children are resilient, and although things may seem hard right now, they will get better for all parties involved. Maintain a positive attitude, and your children will, too.

References:

Learning to Fight Keeps Teens Out of Trouble

Do’s and Don’ts of Co-Parenting Well

Kenneth B Murov Law Firm

Helping Children with Divorce or Separation


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